有时候阅读一些幽默搞笑的英语故事,除了能让人产生兴趣更能提高英语阅读水平,今天本站小编在这里为大家分享一些英语搞笑小故事100字,希望大家会喜欢这些英语幽默故事!
英语搞笑小故事100字篇1“走不动了”
Out-of-state friends of ours recently inherited several pieces of real estate which, unfortunately, are producing more taxes than income. When my wife invited thenn for a visit,back carne the response:"You know we'd love it. But right now we're just too property-stricken to go anywhere."
我们外州的朋友最近继承了几块地产。不幸的是几块地产给他们的不是收入,而是税款。我妻子邀请他们来玩的时候,他们说:“你知道我们是很乐意去的。但是,我们现在让对产压得哪儿也去不了了。”
英语搞笑小故事篇2把他送走!
The children begged for a hamster, and after the usual fervent vows that they alone would care for it,they got one. They named it Danny. Two months later, when found herself responsible for cleaning and feediag the creature,she located a prospective new home for it. The children took the news of them remarked,"He's been around here a long time_we'll miss him."
我的孩子们都想要一只仓鼠。在他们发出了坚定的誓言—自己照顾那个动物之后,他们真的得到了一只。他们给它取了名字叫“丹尼”。两个月后,妈妈终于意识到实际上清洗和喂养这只动物的事全是由她一人承当着。因此,她为那只仓鼠找了个新家。孩于们对“丹尼”的离开并没做出什么反应。只有其中的一个说了句:“他和我们在一起已有很长一段时间了—我们会想他的。”
"Yes,"Mom replied."But he's too much work for one person,and since I'm that one person,I say he goes."
“是呀,”妈妈说,“但是,由一个人来照顾他也实在是够累的。既然我就是那个人,我说送他走.”
Another child offered,"Well,maybe if he wouldn't eat so much and wouldn't be so messy,we could keep him."
另一个孩于说:“如果他吃的不那么多,他不那么脏乱,也许我们还能把他留下。”
But Mom was firm."It's time to take Danny to his new home now,"she insisted."Go and get his cage."
但是妈妈很坚决:“现在该给丹尼找个新家了,”妈妈一点儿也不肯让步。“去把他的笼子拿来。”
With one voice and in tearful outrage the children shouted,"Danny? We thought you said Daddy!"
这时孩子们异口同声地喊了起来:“丹尼?我们还以为是送爹爹走呢!”
英语搞笑小故事篇3一报还一报
An acquaintance of mine stopped at a local tavern after work and spent the evening there. When’ he arrived home around ten o'clock, his wife was sitting at the kitchen table,waiting. Instead of questioning or scolding him,however , she simply asked pleasantly if he wanted dinner. He was not interested in eating,and went off to bed.
我的一个熟人在一次下班后,把车停在了一个小饭馆前,在那儿他消磨可一个晚上。大约十点钟他才回到家。他的妻子坐在厨房的桌旁等他。她没有追问他什么,也没有责怪他,只是和蔼地问他想不想吃点什么。他已经对晚餐不感兴趣,于是,就上床睡觉了。
At 3:30 a. m.,the alarm went off. He scrambled out of bed and turned on the light. When he saw the time, he roared at his wife,demanding an explanation.
大约在凌晨三点半的时候,闹钟突然响了。他赶紧掀开了被子,打开了灯。当他看清了时问时,他冲妻子大声地吼叫为什么。
"Well,"she replied placidly, "if it took you four-hours to get home from work,I figured it would take you four hours to get back to work,and I didn't want you to be late. "
妻子和气地说:“我想,假如你下班回家路止花了四个小时的话,你上班当然也需要花四个小时赶路了。我只是不想让你迟到。”
英语搞笑小故事篇4Drunk One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk." "But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"
醉酒 一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄,老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道:“爸爸,‘醉’字是什么意思?” “唔,孩子,”父亲回答说,“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个,那么我就算醉了。” “可是,爸爸, ”孩子说,“那儿只有一个警察呀!”
英语搞笑小故事篇5hey Are Directly from America
Not long after an old Chinese women came back to china from her visit to her daughter in the Sates, she went to a city bank to deposit the U.S. dollars her daughter give her . At the bank counter ,the money was real.It mady out of patience.At last she couid not hold any more, uttering :“trust me, Sir, and trustthe money .They are real U.S. dollars. They.are directly from America. ”
真美钞
一位中国老妇人到美国去看望女儿回来不久,到一家银行取存女儿送给她的美元.在银行柜台,银行职员认真仔细的检查了每一张钞票看,是否有假.这种做法使老妇人很不耐烦,最后实在忍不住说:“相信我,先生,也请你相信这些钞票.这都是真正的美元,是从美国直接带来的.”
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